Home > Managing Behaviour > Positive Parenting at Home

Positive Parenting at Home

By: Sarah Edwards - Updated: 2 Feb 2013 | comments*Discuss
 
Positive Parenting At Home

All children require positive influences in their lives, and positive parenting begins at home. Although sometimes you may feel that you have completely run out of patience, or are simply too tired to even begin to think about staying positive, it is really important to stay in control of your parenting skills.

Challenging Behaviour

Children like to throw us new challenges, and at every stage of development, and every age group you will find that your parenting skills will need to be updated, re considered and carefully fine tuned in order to remain a positive influence in your children’s lives.

Patience is a Virtue!

When your child’s behaviour is really proving to be difficult it is often very easy to snap, shout and lose your patience. It is perfectly normal to feel this way, and after all, we are only human (even if we ARE parents!). Giving your child boundaries is really important as this not only makes your life much easier, but it also means that your child will always know the difference between acceptable and unacceptable behaviour. Children without boundaries may appear to have loads of freedom, but this is not a good long term approach as they may well have under developed social skills and find certain situations very hard to deal with.

Praise for Positive Behaviour

Positive and good behaviour should always be rewarded, but negative or challenging behaviour should also be acknowledged and dealt with in a positive way-if possible. Tired parents who have been working all week and then have to deal with difficult and unreasonable and tiresome behaviour from their children can be forgiven for occasionally letting their guard down, however if you have made rules and boundaries it is far better to try and stick to them as the ultimate outcome will be far more positive.

Managing Behaviour

Children respond well to boundaries and will also respond well to reward schemes for displaying positive behaviour. Star charts and other devices that actually demonstrate your child’s achievements will always go down really well and lead to even more positive behaviour in the future. However, you do need to think carefully about your reward system and ensure that the behaviour your child is being rewarded for is relevant.

Reward Schemes

For example, if you have a child who wants to watch breakfast television but refuses to get dressed in the morning ready for school this can be incredibly stressful as we all know that early mornings and bedtimes are potentially the most difficult times. Therefore, explain to your child that if they get dressed before they come downstairs, they can watch 20 minutes of television before they go to school. This reward will be immediately relevant to your child as they immediately see a result for a very small change in behaviour.To create a positive situation at this crucial time of day is really important for the whole family, as it means that the day starts on a positive note for everyone.

The same system can be used at mealtimes and bedtimes and for the same reasons. These times of day are really critical in terms of timings and schedules and it’s great if everything can go smoothly. Eating food that they are not that keen on, and going to bed on time can bring rewards of their own, and these can be marked on a star chart or reward chart hung up on the kitchen door or elsewhere in the house.

A Positive Outcome

By collecting rewards, stars or points you can actively encourage your child to make changes to their behaviour that have a real impact on those around them. Keep track of all the good moments throughout the week and then treat them to something special, to say thank you.

You might also like...
Share Your Story, Join the Discussion or Seek Advice..
Why not be the first to leave a comment for discussion, ask for advice or share your story...

If you'd like to ask a question one of our experts (workload permitting) or a helpful reader hopefully can help you... We also love comments and interesting stories

Title:
(never shown)
Firstname:
(never shown)
Surname:
(never shown)
Email:
(never shown)
Nickname:
(shown)
Comment:
Validate:
Enter word:
Latest Comments
  • Always Rocked
    Re: Children and Body Rocking
    This is such a relief that there are many others like me. My mom told me that I used to rock myself to sleep in my crib. From a young…
    19 February 2018
  • Sookie
    Re: Children and Body Rocking
    I rocked back and forth alot during my chid hood until about age 19. I force myself to stop because I did not want people to think I…
    19 February 2018
  • Tonya
    Re: Children and Body Rocking
    My son is now 8 years old and has rocked since he was a baby. He also humms or says words repeatedly. like a mantra. He does have…
    16 February 2018
  • Vick
    Re: Questionnaire: Does Your Child Have ADHD?
    My son is 7 he hits out at me is very nasty to his sister perfect at school doesn't listen to me at all climbs…
    15 February 2018
  • Rocker
    Re: Children and Body Rocking
    I’m 60 yrs old - I’ve rocked my entire life. I’m intelligent, productive, successful and I love to rock – perhaps the reason I love…
    15 February 2018
  • Tb8791
    Re: Children and Body Rocking
    My 4yo does this and says choice words over and over. At first it was just “mamma, daddy” but now it’s any 2 or 3 word phrase on her…
    11 February 2018
  • Tippy
    Re: Child Anxiety Disorders
    My son aged 4 attends nursery and hits other children almost daily, he can be quite aggressive towards his siblings and his Dad and l, he…
    7 February 2018
  • car
    Re: Children and Body Rocking
    Both my twin Daughters did this rocking all of there childhood up to adult hood. They both ended up with schizophrenia in there late…
    3 February 2018
  • Gammy
    Re: Children and Whining
    Hi Angie, My daughter and her two kids are living with us until my daughter finishes up her Masters degree. My granddaughter is 5 years…
    26 January 2018
  • Laura
    Re: Oppositional Defiant Disorder (ODD)
    My 10-year -old son goes beserk if I ask him to do simple things , he hits and bites himself , goes in his upstairs…
    22 January 2018
Further Reading...
Our Most Popular...
Add to my Yahoo!
Add to Google
Stumble this
Add to Twitter
Add To Facebook
RSS feed
You should seek independent professional advice before acting upon any information on the KidsBehaviour website. Please read our Disclaimer.