Home > Encouraging Good Behaviour > Friend Helped Me Cope With My Parents Divorce: A Case Study

Friend Helped Me Cope With My Parents Divorce: A Case Study

By: Sarah Edwards - Updated: 7 Sep 2010 | comments*Discuss
 
Friend Helped Me Cope With My Parents Divorce: A Case Study

Family problems can impact heavily on children, and they often rely on their friends for support when things are difficult at home. For Max, 13, he found support and help from his school friends when his parents announced they were getting divorced.

Max said: “I was 13 when I was told my parents were splitting up. I wasn’t that surprised and I hadn’t been getting on with my Dad for ages but it was still unsettling and a bit weird. I knew that lots of my friends had divorced parents and it’s quite common for children to be brought up in a house with just one parent so I didn’t feel like the odd one out.”

Good Support

“My friends were brilliant and really helped me a lot. They made the whole thing really normal and taught me how not to get dragged in to my parents arguments - they argued A LOT and were often very loud - doors slamming that sort of thing. I am glad I had my friends and they lived nearby because when things got rough I just got out of the way!”

“You don’t want to think that your parents might split up-even if you haven’t been getting on very well, and as time went on I did start to think that maybe if they just stopped shouting they might actually listen to each other and be able to work things out. When I said this to Mum she was really sad and realised how upsetting it must have been for me. I don’t think either of my parents had really given me much thought to be honest! They had been so busy yelling and arguing at each other that I didn’t seem that important.”

True Friends

“I don’t know how I would have coped without my friends. They made me laugh; listened when I needed to talk about it and their parents fed me! Sometimes it felt like I didn’t really exist at home at all, but my friends were always there to make sure I was OK and distract me with anything from a chocolate bar to a DVD! I have a great group of friends - boys and girls - and lots of us have known each other since preschool so we go way back. I know I am very lucky to have some great people around me and when my parents did actually get divorced and my Dad moved out, they were all there to help me.”

Moving Forward

“I think getting divorced was the best thing for Mum and Dad because they are really good friends now they don’t live together! It’s weird how things work out really and I see both of them a lot. We even go out together once a week and it’s great. My friends are still there - I think they always will be. They knew how I felt because they had been through the same experience and I am so grateful to them. I just hope that if the same thing happened to another friend I would be able to help them too. It’s true what they say - you really know who your friends are when things are bad.”

You might also like...
Share Your Story, Join the Discussion or Seek Advice..
Why not be the first to leave a comment for discussion, ask for advice or share your story...

If you'd like to ask a question one of our experts (workload permitting) or a helpful reader hopefully can help you... We also love comments and interesting stories

Title:
(never shown)
Firstname:
(never shown)
Surname:
(never shown)
Email:
(never shown)
Nickname:
(shown)
Comment:
Validate:
Enter word:
Latest Comments
  • Weemow42
    Re: Questionnaire: Does Your Child Have ADHD?
    Hi I am also having some problems with my 12 year old son,he gets proper bullied everyday..to the point that they…
    17 October 2018
  • Ali
    Re: Children and Self-Harm
    My son is 8 and he as started biting himself for the last couple of weeks he as come to me and said kids at school are calling him thick…
    16 October 2018
  • godly owner of gods
    Re: Smacking and Children
    god does not condone this ban it
    11 October 2018
  • Sunshine
    Re: Children and Swearing
    My nearly 8 year old boy is exactly the same no matter what we do to try stop his swearing.
    10 October 2018
  • clarina
    Re: Questionnaire: Does Your Child Have ADHD?
    My daughter 9 in November has started to make cat miauwing. It is quite an annoying sound. I also feel it…
    2 October 2018
  • Nate
    Re: Grounding Children
    So well today me and my sister teased a kid and we both got a detention but when got home are mom gave us both a spanking and we both got…
    30 September 2018
  • Caroline
    Re: Interview: Working with Behavioural Issues in Children
    Myself and my husband are really struggling with our 3 children. There behaviours are…
    30 September 2018
  • Woody
    Re: Oppositional Defiant Disorder (ODD)
    My son now 15 has shown (what I think may be signs of ODD ) most noticeably since year 6. He is defiant , will challenge…
    16 September 2018
  • bbw
    Re: Children and Body Rocking
    I have rocked as long as I can remember. I would bang my head against the back of the couch so often that the metal rod in the piping…
    6 September 2018
  • pumpkin
    Re: Smacking and Children
    I am now 53 years old and am suffering from mental health issues.My father physically beat me with leather belt when mother was away,my…
    4 September 2018