Home > Encouraging Good Behaviour > Friend Helped Me Cope With My Parents Divorce: A Case Study

Friend Helped Me Cope With My Parents Divorce: A Case Study

By: Sarah Edwards - Updated: 7 Sep 2010 | comments*Discuss
 
Friend Helped Me Cope With My Parents Divorce: A Case Study

Family problems can impact heavily on children, and they often rely on their friends for support when things are difficult at home. For Max, 13, he found support and help from his school friends when his parents announced they were getting divorced.

Max said: “I was 13 when I was told my parents were splitting up. I wasn’t that surprised and I hadn’t been getting on with my Dad for ages but it was still unsettling and a bit weird. I knew that lots of my friends had divorced parents and it’s quite common for children to be brought up in a house with just one parent so I didn’t feel like the odd one out.”

Good Support

“My friends were brilliant and really helped me a lot. They made the whole thing really normal and taught me how not to get dragged in to my parents arguments - they argued A LOT and were often very loud - doors slamming that sort of thing. I am glad I had my friends and they lived nearby because when things got rough I just got out of the way!”

“You don’t want to think that your parents might split up-even if you haven’t been getting on very well, and as time went on I did start to think that maybe if they just stopped shouting they might actually listen to each other and be able to work things out. When I said this to Mum she was really sad and realised how upsetting it must have been for me. I don’t think either of my parents had really given me much thought to be honest! They had been so busy yelling and arguing at each other that I didn’t seem that important.”

True Friends

“I don’t know how I would have coped without my friends. They made me laugh; listened when I needed to talk about it and their parents fed me! Sometimes it felt like I didn’t really exist at home at all, but my friends were always there to make sure I was OK and distract me with anything from a chocolate bar to a DVD! I have a great group of friends - boys and girls - and lots of us have known each other since preschool so we go way back. I know I am very lucky to have some great people around me and when my parents did actually get divorced and my Dad moved out, they were all there to help me.”

Moving Forward

“I think getting divorced was the best thing for Mum and Dad because they are really good friends now they don’t live together! It’s weird how things work out really and I see both of them a lot. We even go out together once a week and it’s great. My friends are still there - I think they always will be. They knew how I felt because they had been through the same experience and I am so grateful to them. I just hope that if the same thing happened to another friend I would be able to help them too. It’s true what they say - you really know who your friends are when things are bad.”

You might also like...
Share Your Story, Join the Discussion or Seek Advice..
Why not be the first to leave a comment for discussion, ask for advice or share your story...

If you'd like to ask a question one of our experts (workload permitting) or a helpful reader hopefully can help you... We also love comments and interesting stories

Title:
(never shown)
Firstname:
(never shown)
Surname:
(never shown)
Email:
(never shown)
Nickname:
(shown)
Comment:
Validate:
Enter word:
Latest Comments
  • Anonymous
    Re: Smacking and Children
    @Rose and Jizzy - have you tried speaking with a teacher about it? If it is happening ALL the time so it's not 'reasonable punishment' then…
    19 February 2021
  • Livi
    Re: Children and Body Rocking
    My sister was a rocker and a head banger in to her teens and she is a total wacko nut job now 50 Just saying!
    18 February 2021
  • connork
    Re: Grounding Children
    i was grounding for 6 weeks for some pirvat stuf AND IM 8 so my dad went on a rv trip and dident take me i lost everything my xbox and he said…
    9 February 2021
  • a kid
    Re: Grounding Children
    i broke 1 minior rule so bacicly im on house arrest for 7 and a half years not lying
    4 February 2021
  • a kid
    Re: Grounding Children
    im 11 and im grounded untill im 18 years old
    4 February 2021
  • whale
    Re: Children and Self-Harm
    My 8 year old brother has been scratching himself for a while when i tell him its time to shower or when i tell him to do something he…
    24 January 2021
  • naz
    Re: Grounding Children
    i've been grounded for ten years because of fortnite
    21 January 2021
  • Jizzy
    Re: Smacking and Children
    So im 12 and my mom has hit me many times before. I suffer from depression and PTSD from it. Sometimes when she moves her hand slightly too…
    8 January 2021
  • Jizzy
    Re: Grounding Children
    So im 12 years and the reason im in trouble for is private but long story short, my mom went through my phone when me and my friends were…
    8 January 2021
  • Mom
    Re: Grounding Children
    I am a mother of four. Three teenagers and an eight year old. I know from personal experience spankings don't work! It just makes the kids act…
    27 December 2020